Pain of the Heart
by Tan Kimiko
Summary: Physical pain can be easily healed. Emotional pain, however, is a different thing altogether...In response to The Narrator's challenge.


**Disclaimers: Samurai Deeper Kyo and its characters do not belong to me.**

Note: In response to The Narrator's challenge.

**Pain of the Heart**

I take in the scene again; quiet and observant in the circumstances that fate gave me. A famed kiler samurai, who easily killed a thousand men, go soft to a woman who looked like an immature, reckless girl of eighteen. His kindness to her is not visible to an ordinary being. A sensitive person, close to an empath, may clearly see his feelings.

_Everything has changed._

Later, surely, they would bicker again over mundane things, his voice quiet and threatening, hers loud and demanding. He almost always tells her that he would kill her, but she knew that he could never do it. A person such as he can't kill someone like her lightly.

_But it seems nothing has changed._

Having changed masters in the span of several days does not concern me. Maybe it's because no one could ever see through me. They could give a bit of trust in me, unconsciously depending on me, not knowing it would someday turn around. Perhaps it is time for me to find a new master.

_Perhaps it is time for a new life._

And then he gives her her gun. It's a subtle gesture, but for a woman who has feelings for a man, I would know, that it meant much more than returning a possession. A symbolical thing.

He shall never know how open his face was in that certain moment, giving me a glance of the person within. Not even the girl facing him understood the importance of that single moment for me, maybe because she already knew him by just looking at his eyes. In that fast moment of openess, I saw love.

Ckear, honest love that was quickly hidden away. Hurt settled on my chest, and not from my wounds. Love that was not given to me. She is lucky she has his love—she should be thankfiul.

_But I will first rectify my old one._

Perhaps in a few years, she would know. Perhaps after a time, his love for her would fade. Perhaps in the future, he would choose me over her. But it is all a guess, something that is still unsure. One could never know what may happen. Endless possibilities are laid down on the sands of time, trickling, flowing down.

But life goes on.

And when he turns to face me, his eyes trained on me for a moment, I am joyous. At least I was a part of his life for only one moment, even for a portion of all his years of living. It was one thing I could never trade for anything, and I knew my loyalty will lie with no other master but him. I have found someone whom I could finally give my entire loyalty to, without any doubt.

And with this realization, I can finally, finally be content.

His eyes were still on me. It's a blank stare—nothing was asked. Yes, she should be thankful she caught the heart of a man like him. Maybe, one day…

With that unfinished, hopeful thought, I smile softly, a smile that could dispel anything that might be in his mind, from doubts of my loyalty to—in my dreams—my present health.

All he does is nod his head very slightly it was unnoticable, and turn away, his attention once again to the woman behind him.

_Be happy._

I was shocked when she turned her gaze to me, and gifted me with a smile so bright that it stunned me. As she lifted her gun, making a move to tuck it in the back of her obi, she mouthed "thank you", and glanced back at him.

Maybe I will never understand what exactly she was thanking me for, but I can generalize that she may be not as naïve and ignorant as what I think she seems to be. My hurt would not dispel now, but maybe, someday…

_Memories linger like pain of the heart, before they fade away._

* * *

Author's Notes: My first SDK fic, and it was a challenge named by The Narrator. How could it not pressure me to do this after seeing the other authors answering the challenge? I have been contemplating in creating a SDK fic, so this would be just fine in for my first try. I am actually proud of it.

There is very little Okuni-based fics out there, so I thought I might give it a shot into shaping her feelings for Kyo into an intro-spective fic that could define her hidden character. Okuni is a very myterious person to begin with, so this was harder than I expected it to be.

Please read and review my first SDK fic. Thank you. The Narrator, cheers to you.


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